Archive
MY LOVE AFFAIR WITH A PYREX BOWL
I love these bowls. I first came across the small on the left by some means I can’t recall. It is the best bowl for soup (lip for gulping the last of the broth.) any Asian food with rice or noodles (a place for your thumb so you can balance the bowl next to your mouth for easy shoveling,) or any damn thing you want to eat out of it in whatever way you see fit! The Amish pattern is quaint and once I looked at it closely I realized I loved it. Who knew I would like “Quaint?”
When Kim and I got married it was clear that there would be some struggle over the single bowl in our pantry. Since shopping online is my new favorite thing to do, eBay, here I come. I found a complete set of the nesting bowls and at a reasonable price and I snapped them right up. Problem solved…two small bowls and a complete set to boot. Well, except for the fact that I came across this picture and almost lost my resolve to stop before I got too carried away!
I am at the point now that I am going to put sticky notes on the variety of bowls, containers, pots, pans, Rubbermaid products and if I don’t use them in a month they are going to go live somewhere else. I teeter on the edge of hoarding and maybe if I get rid of the stuff I have taking up valuable shelf space in the kitchen, I can more easily dedicate myself to trying to get rid of those size 10 jeans that have been in my wardrobe since 1987!
NINE MONTHS, NO BABY. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?
OK, I am now in a place where I can talk about the past weeks medical events.
MONDAY: The invasive x-ray that I insisted on seeing in real time. Unfortunately, I have been through this enough times to see that news wasn’t going to be the best.
THURSDAY:Saw my Wonderful Doctor! He saw the same thing in the x-ray that I saw but was in a better position to interpret the results. The best news would have been that it was time for a takedown of the ileostomy. Worst news would have been this was to be a permanent fixture in my life. (Believe it or not, I have prepared myself for that by assuming the worst.)
Luckily, Dr. Wonderful had a few more things to say about it. There are three choices.
1. Just hang around for another three or four months and see if it heals itself finally and try not to think about it. (Right, not going to happen!)
2. Have another invasive procedure that Dr. Wonderful will perform while I am knocked out so that I won’t be there to assist in the diagnosis. (Smart man.) This will give a clearer picture of what is what in there and decide if #1 or #3 is the best solution.
3. Surgical do over and start the process again. Not the best option, but a possibility that exists. Not as frightening as I once thought but not what I want either.
4. Accept my new friend as a life partner and get on with it. The down side to this is more subtle than obvious. The most obvious downside of this for me is the eventual acceptance that I will just have to deal with the effects of cruciferous vegetables in a fashion that cannot be done without having to actively participate in it.
I have finally gotten to the point that I can honestly only rely on the words of a very succinct philosopher of our times:
“And so it goes…”
— Kurt Vonnegut (Slaughterhouse-Five)
What ADHD has done for me
At age 64 I think I am finally giving up the pursuit of perfection in my being. At least, I hope I have. It is a strange thing to be diagnosed at 50 and to have it explain the missing achievements of the past. So, as I look around my bedroom at the stacks of clothes not put away, books not read, drawers left half-open I find that I finally want to let go of the feeling of failing for being able to keep it things in the perfect order that I have been brainwashed into believing that they should be.
I am absolutely certain that the number of broken bones I have incurred, the cuts, the falls, the clumsiness can be attributed to the ADHD. While my career as a ballerina was in no way affected since it was never a goal, I can see why so many things in my life happened the way they did. Crazy parental behavior played a part in it, also. By the time high school graduation arrived I had lived in no fewer than four states, twelve cities and, at a minimum, fifteen houses, apartments, and hovels. This does not include the few empty houses my mother broke into so we wouldn’t sleep in an alley somewhere.
All of this has led to a strange affliction of self doubt, feelings of total insecurity and an absolute tendency to say whatever is on my mind at the most inopportune moments. It has also created an individual that has survived much of with a wicked sense of humor, a cornucopia of useless knowledge and a level of guilt that I am now totally willing to pass on to some void in the sky.
Meanwhile, the pile of books sets untouched, the clothes are easier to get to and I have to go now and do something that doesn’t require me to sit still for more that 10 minute.
ONE OF THE FIRST EXPERIENCES IN THE NORTHLAND
Who would ever have expected that a simple change in the pronunciation of a word could bring about such confusion. After moving to Minnesota over 35+ years ago, my first trip through the Upper Peninsula of Michigan would surprise the hell out of me. There were signs saying “PASTIES IN FIVE MILES,” ‘GET YOUR PASTIES IN THREE MILES,’ and ‘YOU CAN’T BEAT OUR PASTIES.”
I moved here from Los Angeles, I knew what pasties were since I had, upon occasion, used them myself. Little did I know that the UP was the producer of such dancing accoutrements.
Imagine my surprise when I discovered they were simply a pocket pie filled with meat and vegetables. I should have known. It turns out that Michigan has more statues of Mary in a Bathtub than any other state in the union.
(By the way, the state motto of Michigan is: “If you want to see a nice peninsula, just look around.” It sounds classier in French.)
I BROKE MY FOOT–CRAP!
What a exciting week for My Right Foot I (hereafter referred to as MRF.) I started Monday off with the first day of my two in a row off. That meant get as much done on Monday as I possible could so that I could spend Tuesday being a slob, also known as lying around, reading, surfing the web, generally doing nothing, in other words. What’s that line? “The best laid schemes o’ mice an’ men / Gang aft a-gley.” Robert Burns jumped up and bit me in the ass.
First part of the day was spent shopping. Oh, joy. Best Buy, SuperOne, Target and finally, Office Max. For all of you that know me, I was ready to explode. At Office Max smiled and asked, “Are you having a nice day?” Now I work retail, I say all the things I’m supposed to say and at that moment I turned into the worst customer I could ever have. “It’s going to be great once I get home, I am suffering from retail overload and am ready to explode from exposure to flourescent lights.” Charming, I’m sure. He stumbled through the rest of the transaction and I heard a visible sigh of relief as the doors closed behind me.
Home again, home again jiggity jig. That always runs through my mind as I pull into the driveway, pop the van open, unload the groceries and start on the in home chores. In the middle of putting the groceries away, I decided to do a load of laundry so that I would be doing two things at once. Oh, and as long as I was in the basement I could clean the catbox. Joy, oh, joy. Karma for rudeness I realized. I grabbed the trash bags and headed down the stairs. Okay, I started down the stairs at a full rush. Eager to clean that cat box? No, not really, just fast is the only speed I know.
Wait, I also know STOP. And I came to a full one when my left foot went out from under me and my right foot bent a full 180° in the WRONG direction. I tried to “cow-person up” and hobbled over to the cat box and immediately knew that changing it wasn’t an option. So, I threw in a load of laundry, limped upstairs, then looked at my foot and went, oops, maybe I should get this x-rayed. Yep, it’s broke and it sure has slowed me down. As in “immobilized” me. So, here I am, sharing the news and letting you know that I have heard that lemon bars help heal bones, oh, and white chocolate raspberry cheese cake, and I don’t want to forget the ever healing properties of chocolate.
ADDENDUM: FOR THOSE CONCERNED WITH MY SHOPPING AT TARGET: I ONLY SHOP THERE WHEN THEY HAVE WHAT IS CALLED A “LOSS LEADER.” THAT IS SOMETHING THAT THEY SELL FOR LESS THAN WHAT THEY PAID FOR IT AND USE IT TO LURE PEOPLE INTO THE STORE TO SPEND EXTRA $$$ ON IMPULSE. I ONLY PURCHASE THE LOSS LEADER, THEREBY COSTING THEM MONEY AND USE MY DEBIT CARD TO PAY SO THEY HAVE TO ALSO PAY THE FEES. I FEEL BETTER NOW!
HOW THE WORLD REALLY WORKS
I suppose that none of us should be surprised by this. Reality takes up a very small portion in the world as we see it. I am constantly having my jaw drop to the floor as I scream “WTF” only in expanded form. I use the internet as a diversion. Not necessarily as a diversion from the world, but as a way to learn more about the world.
I am constantly running across views that we never see if we read the local newspaper, watch the national news or even spend a reasonable amount of time listening to public radio. Does this make me feel any better? Hell, no. Instead I am find myself using facebook as a forum for my views on the world. I post articles, cartoons and opinions that fall into my field of thinking.
What does that mean? It means I get to read something, approve it and share it. But, where are my opinions about this. Oh, someone else is going to show them to you. Sometimes I may have an opinion worth sharing.Or, have I become so lazy that I just let others think for me? Is that my new reality? Hopefully, I will start to change that as I have made a commitment to myself to participate instead of just watch the world go by.
While the days of overt activism may be over, I can share these opinions on the WWW and get some of this internal ranting out there for you to enjoy. Bon appetit!
Here’s the link that the above graphic comes from.
My, My, Why Aren’t We Still Doing This?
There are definitely some things that escape my imagination. And, now I believe you will be as gobsmacked as I was!
The Migration of Pictures After Death will put you in the perfect mood for a beverage or two. Please don’t hate me for posting this, if you know me well, you know I couldn’t help myself.
Spoons, Perez Prado and Things That Make Me Go WooHoo
I am absolutely certain that for many of you spoons will not take up an inordinate amount of thinking time. Well, let me tell you something.
There are many attributes to spoons and being a true connoisseur I am here to share the knowledge that you have perhaps missed in your education about eating utensils.
Winter is soup time. Soup means spoons. And soup spoons mean a lot of different things to different people. The array of spoons above are displayed in a fan based upon size. There are:
- teaspoons
- dessert spoons
- soup spoons
- tablespoons
- serving spoons
Though soup spoons and dessert spoons have the same capacities they are for the most part quite different. However, it is interesting that people often use them interchangeably. A soup spoon’s shape is round having a concave bowl. A dessert spoon on the other hand will be egg-like in shape. So, in terms of capacity a tablespoon is the equivalent of three teaspoons while two soup or dessert spoons are equivalent to one tablespoon.
And, now the point of the spoon presentation. I detest any spoon smaller than a ‘tablespoon.’ Eating soup from a teaspoon causes one’s lips to curl up due to the high sides of the spoon. Dessert spoons are useless. If I’m having dessert give me a big damned spoon. Soup spoons are round and shallow, so that while they don’t cause one’s lips to curl, they do cause one to get a very small mouthful of soup.
It is at this point I will point out that as a child I was taught to eat soup with a soup spoon and to say the following:
As the ships go out to sea, I dip my spoon away from me.
Yeah, right. If I’m ever sitting next to anyone who knows me and expects me to eat soup with a soup spoon in that fashion, well, good luck with that.
But, I digress. I have eaten soup with a ‘tablespoon’ for years. Not dipping away from me, but with a shoveling motion getting as much into my mouth as is possible in one swoop. Well, tonight I ‘accidentally’ grabbed a ‘serving’ spoon as I carried my tray of soup, crackers and butter to bed to watch La grande finale of Project Runway. While having the bitch Gretchen win was almost enough to make me have indigestion, I discovered just how much soup I could force into my mouth with a ‘serving’ spoon and that totally pushed me past the disgust at the outcome of the show.
The only thing that I can think of that comes close to this ‘foodie’ discovery is when I found that a Reese’s Peanut Butter cup is always Bite Size.
Now to Perez Prado. I started watching Iris this afternoon. I haven’t seen it for years and truly love everything about the movie. When the song “Cherry Pink and Apple Blossom White” started playing in one of the scenes, the name of Perez Prado popped right out of my mouth. Great! This means that while I am watching a movie about the onset of Alzheimer’s just made me as smug as one could be. That is, until I also remembered that with that particular disease, the memories of long ago stay very well while the question of why I am standing in front of the refrigerator door for 10 minutes while I try to remember exactly what it is that I am looking for escapes me. I am still feeling pretty cocky about remembering Perez Prado, screw the concept of the aging mind, I can’t really remember why it matters anyway.
And, the things that make me go woohoo today are:
- Tina brought me presents from Philadelphia that included a garlic press, silicone ice cube trays shaped like fish, hearts and bon bons, candy, a basket and a beautiful silk scarf to tie it all together.
- If I lose another pound I will be below 200 lbs for the first time in oh so many years. The highlight is that I increased the lie on my driver’s license from 150 to 175 and am now so much closer to a truthful driver. (Did you know that if you are more than 25 lbs off on your stated weight it is a crime in MN? I am just waiting for the cop to tell me, “Sarah, you look much fatter than 175 lbs.” )
- I am making a blog entry after oh so many months and it feels good again. Maybe something I should keep up on, whataya think?
I suppose that’s it for this episode. Please stay tuned for further updates.
WHATEVER WAS I THINKING? 